A Guide to planning your own wedding by a real CT Wedding Planner

What’s up guys! Today I want to chat about ANXIETY – and boy do I have that!! In these past few months of beginning my planning, I’ve come to realize how stressful this whole process is as a bride versus a planner. Being in the industry, I always thought that it would be easy breezy choosing all my vendors and getting everything in place, but NOPE. I had no idea how constantly conflicted I would feel trying to balance pleasing others versus focusing on myself and choosing what I want for my wedding (it is mine and Josh's day after all!)

As I am an early bird, I feel that I do have plenty of time to truly decide who I want to be standing by me on my special day, but I feel I’m being pressured into making the decisions. Everyone keeps asking and asking and asking…and I’m just not ready! Recently a friend of mine got married, and I thought that we were super close, and no doubt in my mind I’d be asked to be in it, but I was wrong and– to be completely honest – basically axed out of her life completely. That really shook me and I now have this fear that someone I don’t ask will be offended and I’ll lose a close friend. I don’t want to crush anyone like that, you feel me? I’m not sure how you all made these choices but I’m STRUGGLING. I guess time will tell and I’ll be sure to introduce you to our party once the final decisions have been made and they say yes!

On another note, writing up our guest list is also supposed to be easy, right? Just coming up with a list of family and friends who we want to share in our special day with, but as we sat down to do so… opinions started FLYING. Realizing that our families are cut from completely different cloths, Josh and I kind of butt heads a little bit about different aspects (attire, inviting children, etc.) and that was unexpected and hard. We don’t usually disagree, so it was extremely tough and to be arguing about our wedding day and seemed ridiculous(!), (this is supposed to be the happiest day of our lives!). Going back and forth between making sure that we didn’t forget anyone, and being respectful of our families wishes/invite requests…freaking EXHAUSTING! We sat down with both mom’s and made sure it was all complete, but I’m super scared that we forgot someone and it gives me anxiety. Just trying to keep my head above water over here!

Finally, choosing a venue was a roller coaster of emotions as well. We toured quite a few different locations, sat in for a food tasting, and finally came to a decision! PHEW… that only took like 3 months. As I called the coordinator to pull together a contract, she told us that our date was no longer available…WHAAAT?! Our date literally got snatched away from us the day before we requested the contract…so it was back to the drawing board, I guess? Either to choose another weekend, or consider having it on a Friday/Sunday…commence panic mode! After asking around, gathering opinions, and making sure that we weren’t asking too much of our guests to have a Friday wedding, I realized something – SCREW THAT! I want to be married that weekend so why did it matter what anyone else thought? So, we decided to pull the trigger and Friday October 4th, 2019 – here we come!

As I work my way through this process, I’m slowly realizing that asking around brings in FAR TOO MANY opinions and it just clouds my vision of what I am dreaming of. I need to constantly remember that I need to choose things that are the perfect fit for us, as the couple, versus what others opinions may be. Keeping in mind that anytime I feel anxious or stressed, I need to bring myself back down to earth and realize that no matter what I choose, it’s going to be the most special day regardless of what anyone says! Keep calm and plan on kittens! Chase your dreams and your day will all come together, don’t let the haters get you down! Tah-tah for now…xxx!

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photography © Andrew Henderson Photography // Landino Photo // The Lace Factory, A Polished Plan